This week has been hectic. A week of mix feelings too.

I can say I have not ahd a great week. Just an average one. I have tried in everyway to make myself the happiest person i can ever be, but things pops up. And it is bad things =(

I am no longer pissed with him. I have tried to just put things down and talk. Although in some ways, I am not too happy with what has happened between us, but I am still trying. I know I was pissed with him. Very pissed indeed. But my anger has just slowly fade. Knowing that I still love and care for this bro of mine. I can never describe how important and significant the impact he has given me. I can never leave him in anyway. I am not being selfish here but in a way, i need him- the someone whom I can really trust and give my all too. Someone like him who has never fail to cheer me up. I am still not happy, but yet, I am no longer sad. I think I should just give him all the time he needs at this time as he is facing some major problems too. I don’t want to get into his way. That is being very ridiculous and not understanding of me if i do that.

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Class has been awesome today =) it may be Thursday- the sucky and boring day filled with Chemistry, Biology, History, Maths, BM etc etc. But today rocks. Thong Leong was absent though. But the first 2 Bio period saw me and Soh writing scripts of some ‘dirty’ stories, and with Qi Kit, Hakim and Davis playing with phone, Davis, Hakim had their breakfast in the lab and Chiu actually ponteng Bio class and last but not least, Jun Yang playing his game boy.

During the 3rd and 4th period of Chemistry, things got even worst- we were all busy listening to the teacher and busy making own Chemistry terms and busy interrupting lessons. But the fact that we knew what was happening.

BM teacher wasn’t around. Moral teacher didn’t came in suprisingly. So we had pure fun- all the non Malays. Heh. We actually drew a big picture of Jane Chan and we actually threw shoes and dusters all over her potrait on the white board. We were enojying ourselves and indulging in MP3s and taking photos of ourselves. We camwhore too somehow. And we were dismissed at 1 because Pn Norbani replaced her class during BM period =)

I HAD LOTSA FUN~~~!!!

Let’s get this right: If you are having a bad mood or somehting bad, don’t just freaking come up to me and release your tantrums. I am just a friend of yours. No relation. I am innocent. Just know your own mood and learn to keep it to yourself. I am your no body. I am just a friend of yours. People who are allowed to throw tantrums at me doesn’t do it and you who is just some sort of friend is doing it. What the heck?

Stop giving me all your mood swings. Seriously, if i don’t want to answer your call at that time, it’s just me. Get me right. You don’t have to tell me what I need to do. And if I am seriously, asleep, trust me! Don’t come call me for some emergency things like needing someone elses phone number for the MANY times. I am NOT YOUR DIRECTORY. Don’t come into class telling me that I didn’t answer your phone call(s). I was seriously asleep. What do you want me to answer you? Answer you in my dreams? Don’t force me to reply something I don’t feel like replying okay? When I didn’t reply you means I don’t have that person’s number. Stop showing me all your ugly faces in class in front of me just because of that freaking phone call. It justs ticks me off. Come on, I can’t answer you when I am sleeping right? How am I suppose too?

The fact that you are angry because I didn’t reply was because I was asleep. I would have replied if i was awake. It was already almost 12am. What do you want me to do? Maybe I should put my mobile phone on general mode and let my parents kill me again for using the phone when I am sleeping. They just hate it. I am tired of all your ‘faces’ and ‘moods’ just because I didn’t reply your sms and calls. I know what I am doing. You are just a friend of mine. Who do you think you are? People who ahve the rights to do it, doesnt do it and you… GET REAL!

BLESSINGS OVERFLOWING

Suddenly I felt I am the most blessed person on earth (:

I am so thankful. I have never felt this happy the past few months. I know I have been so pesimistic about things, so negative in my thoughts. But maybe after months of ordeal, things are starting to get back into how it used to be. =) I am glad that things are slowly getting on and moving on well in my life. I know, if I were to compare my life to some people, mine is way way better. I am grateful and contented.

Firstly, MASQUERADE NIGHT is such a memorable night. The night consisted of a worship concert and a party really showed me how the Almighty God works in many many ways. I led worship. It is not about who leads what and who does what, but most importantly, it was great because God was in the picture throughout. God blessed us financially, He blessed us with a good weather, a good PA syster in Shalom Hall and Rooftop. Things were great. Our prayers were never in vain from the beginning to the end of the night. The concert was fantabulous I would say. It was a bomb. Nevertheless, we ran out of food that night because we did not prepare for that many that night. But the good thing is, food wasn’t enough and it was a good sign actually. We ended up running all the way down to grab some other food in Jalan Alor like satays and noodles. The weather on the rooftop was perfect. We were so worried that it would ran after setting up the stage and lights and all but God was in charge from the beginning to the end. Ended up we had fun. An attendance of about 160 turn up.

Secondly, WOW, I guess this is the best suprise I have ever got so far in this year. Who would have ever thought someone who didn’t bother to see me after so many months since last year turn up just to give me a big suprise. I was just shocked. I am out of words to describe that fantastic feeling. =) And so, yeah, the ROCKers actually kinda ditched me for the movie TRANSFORMERS. So, I was alone in the lobby of the church talking to my mum. Heh. And not expecting the coming of my bro, since he said he was lazing at home. It was normal for us to report our stuffs and our location to each other thru phone or sms-es. And suddenly, I saw him walking pass the door (: And the first thing was he saw me there. It was kinda drizzling at that time as well. But he managed to come for MY SAKE! Was just chilling around with him at the lobby and I decided to go out with him instead of going home. Heh. We walked around at Sungai Wang and just kept walking aimlessly actually. And suddenly, we bet on the existance of Chosen Treasure. AND HE LOST THE BET! He was lucky enough, because I was so merciful towards him xD We went to Times Square later and he got tickets to watch Transformers with his girlfriend later at 330pm. Yeah, he ditched me later too =P actually not really lah. I got to go too. I left at 330pm. We had lunch and walked around while waiting for the coming of his ‘baby’, my sis-in-law =P We went to BORDERS after she arrived for a walk and read and that was basically my day with him. His girlfriend completely took over from me =) So, I left them for i have some ‘appointments’ too. =P

Next, some stupid monthly test I have, I got 100. lol. What a joke =P

And there are just so many things that i can thank God for. It is never ending.

After so many months of depression and all, I AM BACK!

I am extraordinary because I really do have an extraordinary GOD =)

Before you even talk and scold others. Reflect on yourself.

Telling people all the things that you ‘think’ others are doing, have you ever thought that you are doing the same either. So, you took a look at me now. And have never looked at your own self. So, I am telling you to even just take a look at yourself in front of the mirror. Just gaze at your own beauty and tell me if you think you are that good and perfect. If you are, congratulations! Whatever. Dun really care at this point ler.

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I am like having some headache, and some bad sore throat. Probably I am just too weak. A concert and party tonight- I can’t wait =P heheheeTill, then.. ciaozzz

What the heck am I blogging early in the morning on a Friday rite?

Yeahs, I skipped school today for some reason yet unknown.

But seriously, my teachers are not around today. And if I were to go to school today, I would only study 1 period.

I think I’d reather spend hours of my time on the computer instead of spending my time in school sleeping and talking.

I mean well, it’s also the eve of Masquerade Night. So, there are some preparations yet to be done.

So, basically excuses for me to skip school lah.

There is some good news I think I should announce:

I WON’T HAVE ENGLISH PERIOD FOR A MONTH!

Jane Chan is leaving for a month for also some unknown reason.

Maybe if I was taught by Mdm Elizabeth or Mdm Ng, I would be so sad not for not having English lessons. Nevertheless, it is Jane Chan. So whether I’ve got class or not also, it doesn’t really matter right. It doesn’t improves my English

Next things next, Pn Mahaya is leaving. My Form 1 supervisor who is now in the morning session is leaving for Saudi Arabia. She teaches perfect English and she is leaving. I still remember the days where we used to say Mahaya Berbahaya. Bahaya coming and stuff like that. I am so sad to see her leave. She is the debates teaching. I guess someone would be taking over. I would definitly miss her tremendously. A malay tacher speaking perfect English.

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SELF CONTROL.

Self control. Some people really don’t have self control. My classmates would know who. I am not mentioning names. I really feel his pain. Really. The wounds and scars on his hands being canned by the parents. If he doesn’t feel the pain, I feel it. Why can’t he stop going to CC. WHy can’t he go after school? He is jst being foolish by making such decisions I guess. He was never like that. I guess someone influenced him.

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People who are going to LTC, good luck and all the best!!

Pathetic people- going with the juniors and Mrs LTP. Gawddd..

I can’t imagine.

Getting new step-brothers? HAHA. I would laughs. Its like teacher is forcing you people to get ome brothers or something like that. Same room with you guys?

Oh, i sympatise u guys.

And you perverted guys! What a plan you guys have to bully the juniors.

I would definitly miss those fun. Hehehe.

But I really have some commitments here that I can’t go.

Not that I am skipping for purpose.

Oh, some of you, stop feeling jealous.

I will not forget that you guys are in Genting. And Oh, I mean kaki bukit genting.

Well, after months of torture and pain, I can finally say I am now on cloud nine =)

Not that I have fully let go everything, but it’s just time that I think I need to stand up again.

I may have to start the journey all over again but I think it’s worth the effort.

I don’t want to hold on to the past anymore. I think I am a happier and a more positive person if I do start anew.

Many things happened. Thats why I am feeling like i’m on cloud nine =P

I won’t talk much on how happy I am and what ahs happened but many significant things happened. I am just amazed at all the suprises people have have to me.

And to that bro of mine, thanks for everything. Seriously, without you, I wouldn’t have been this happy and glad. You guys made my day.

And to her, I have nothing to say lol.. Speechless… *****.

Love euuuu =)

Blogging after a week of silence.

I have learnt many things this week. Seriously.

This is gonna get me emo again but anything.

Probably I shouldn’t have take things so seriously. If I did not take things tht seriously, I might not be in such pain and in such state of anxiety. I am learning to let go at this point. I am startng to see a bigger and clearer picture if I didn’t behave this way. I wish that things were never like this. Maybe it’s time I should let go. I should carry on with my life and I think you should too. I’m never good enough for you.

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On the other hand, now that both of you found a new friend. I am glad for you. I am happy for you. I am trying to see the three of you being an awesome team. We may have fought. And we have not talk for bout a year now. But I am still happy for you both. I can sincerely thank you for the moments you both gave to me. It has been great and awesome. I used to remember the time when we both would study in the library and do assignments together as a team. It is now again, a thing of the past. One of you may still be in my class, the other in the next, but I am glad you both found urself a new study partner. Maybe my replacement. I don’t know.

If I were to blame someone, I would blame Kenneth. He was such a nice friend and ended up betraying us and get us all to argue and I still believe till today that it was all a misunderstanding. Sorry for not making it up because I really don’t have the guts. I don’t know how to explain it to you. And now Kenneth is in such a good mood seing us fight. Such a hypocrite. I am not talking to him maybe for the rest of my life. Come and ask me for soalan bocor for SPM thru MSN tht day, i won’t give a damn.

All in all, you have been a great friend of mine. I am glad you found someone to replace my position. You will always be my friend always and forever. I may not talk to you but I do care for what is happening to you. Good luck in your robotics yeah, you both? =) And to Kenneth, I can care-less about you. Really.

thanks to you…