I had a fantatatastic day today! I guess it was much fun although I am lethargic.

Yesh, I finally went into Sunway Lagoon today with my youth cell group. Our apologies for not being so daring to bring a camera, so no pics. Don’t even think of pics of bikinis and all. =D

We met at church early morning and the 8 of us were like early. Even before Sunway Lagoon was opened. But we managed to go on most of the rides (minus those I am afraid off =p). Rides were really fun. Love the wet rides instead. Not too scary; not too boring. The flume water thingy was fun too! 😀

I have one of the awesomest youth members in my youths. Although many couldn’t make it; but we still enjoyed it. We came back around 5pm or more. All tired but we screamed together, laughed together, shouted together. And it was really really really fun being with the group of people – who has the same passion as you for Jesus! 😀

On another note, I went to Genting for a night trip yesterday. To visit the Heroes Campers and to have a cuppa. I finally had my Toffee Nut Frappuccino. I’ve been wanting it for soooo long already. And now I’ve got it finally! Next craving: The Prosperity Burger. Oh shucks, just remembered I need to lose weight. I’ll try to have self control. =)

I wished classes was over so that I can sleep and sleep and have fun! But sigh, it’s not. this week is just the final week. Assignments pilling up. But not doing it till January. =D I am one good procrastinator. I think I am la.

And yeah, looking forward to more fun days ahead! Wait, I think tmr is another (fun)day! 😀

I hope you read this.

I don’t mean to be ignorant. Neither did I meant to give you that ‘cold’ touch. But I couldn’t help it. My heart is so wounded over that many instances and I wished I could still be who I used to be when with you.

It’s not that I don’t love you anymore. Or it isn’t that I don’t care. But my heart can’t resist the pain thts coming out of it. I still do care. If you think I don’t.

I still want to be who I was to you years ago. And years to come. I’ve developed a phobia of starting a conversation with you now because I am afraid I’d get ignored. I’m afraid that we would start arguing and the list goes on. Yeah, I am scared. This was unknowingly developed.

I now know why I choose to read smses so late at night and just throw my phone on the bed. It’s because I am so afraid. Afraid that we would argue; afraid that you’d not even reply.

I know. It’s sick. But it’s also painful.

As much as I hope you’re feeling the pain; just so you know, I am nowhere any better.

If you think I didn’t want to meet you, I want it so much. But I don’t know what my reaction would be. My heart is so wounded and so low confidence when it comes to you. Now. Only now.

I don’t know. I tried repairing this brokeness. But I can’t seem to do it alone. By myself.

I am trying to put on that smile for you; but I want you to know that it has not been easy for me. To be the way I am.

I still love you like I used to. Cared like I used to. Just that…