day dreaming

When more of my days are turning merely into day dreams. Today is just one of them. One more week to go. Day dream is my new name. Reading ‘The Five Love Languages for Singles’ is quite appealing to me. Honestly, I hate reading but that book caught my attention. I get tired reading easily. Maybe it’s a syndrome of not reading for a long time.

I have learnt that I should not underestimate what God can do. Or I should not even put a standard for God; because He really exceeds all my standards. What He can do is far greater than what I can do. Only He changes lives and He changes people. I can’t. And I am glad to be used by Him. =)

I am trying to get over the ‘grow up’ thingy. Really. Maybe when I am better, I will sms back the person but I can honestly tell you the feelings hurts. Hurts me really much. The thought in me has never ended. I am trying to tell myself, ‘Alvin, it’s okay! Just treat it as some sort of joke’. But my heart tells me, ‘Has this person ever thought about my feelings before telling me that?’, ‘This person should apologise, NOT ME’. Argh. It isn’t easy getting over a word that came right pierced through your heart. It’s painful deep within.

I want to get over it and put it aside. I’ve forgived way too many times but I wonder why I failed to do so this time. Apparently, I am so freaking serious this time. The care and concern is still there. But I am trying to handle it well this time. In a matured way. Let’s see from where this goes.

I am starting to realise I fell for it again. This it is something so unexpected. It is something not my thing neither it is something of my type. But it really caught my attention, my care and my concern. I don’t know but it has now a place in my heart. A very close one indeed. This is causing me to ask if I’ve changed in terms of preference. But we’ll see. A week of absence for me to think thoroughly