Everyone knows (most of the people in my life) knows how much and how desperate I am to live school but yet a feeling of missing things and a feeling of uncertainties strikes me. I don’t know what awaits me after this. But the fact that I am sure I won’t be studying in my school really strikes me. It is less than 3 more months, I’d be leaving the school and I am having a mixture of feelings. I am not going back to Form 6 because of personal reasons. But 1 thing remains- it is not because of the school. My school reigns supreme and no one stands anyone to say anything about it.
Just spend a minute or two being me. And imagine this- I walk down the Bukit Nanas hill for the past 11 years. And my dad fetches me to school up the hill every morning. Imagine what my life would be next year when I don’t have to travel walking around the hill? Just imagine. It may be a lil tiring but it has become a routing; a part of my life already. I can’t imagine myself next eyar walking to a college not dressed in uniform.
St John’s is a school that I have chosen BY MYSELF. NO ONE ELSE! I was the one who said NO to Hang Tuah and YES to SJI. And it is one of the BEST decision I have ever made in my life. I insisted on St John’s. I somehow feel belonged being in SJI instead of Hang Tuah. I thank my parents for being supportive at that time. And I have never regretted the choice I made.
It is amazing how God has been working miraculously in my life for the past 11 years protecting me and showing me His grace and mercy. God has been good in showering His blessings upon me in my 11 years of schooling in St John’s. He has shown me what school is all about; what friends are for and most importantly how teachers impact our lives! Without Him, life in school wouldn’t be fun. I may feel ‘out’ at times but I know I was never lonely because my friends are always by my side to cheer me up and to bring joy and colours into my life. Life in school or even life itself, generally is NEVER A BED OF ROSES! But it isn’t full with thorns either!~
I do scared I would be ALL BY MYSELF when I leave school. I am not exactly scared but I do have such a feeling. Not because I can’t mix around and all but things would change. And it is like starting all over again from scratch. And it somehow hits me.Writing this do cause me some pain and cause me to think a lot. Things are just passing by my mind and I can’t stop thinking about how much life would change when i step out of St John’s Institution. I know life will definitly change and I need to re adjust my life ALL OVER AGAIN.
IT IS COMING TO AN END. WHAT AWAITS ME THERE? =S