Monthly Archives: November 2008

ADORE 2008

ADORE 2008
Christmas.Concert.Celebration

December 19th 2008 : KL Baptist Church : 7pm

Be there or be square.
More details on this coming up!

Paranoid

I am paranoid with someone who is just prolly ignorant and annoyed over me and giving some cold replies. Someone who has the obligation to tell things yet doesnt. Haih. Confused as to how a person thinks at times.

I’ve made choices of my own..

I realise Ive made choices of my own that has caused me to get such consequences. I don’t know how to put it into words but it was my own choice. I’ve been very moody today. I suppose the more I stay at home and get my own time, the more moody I am. I tend to think so much more than I am in college. And it’s starting to get sick although it’s just my first off-day in Semester 3. I’ve many more Mondays and Fridays off to go. I completed all that I need to complete, do all I need to do. But shucks, I still have time to be alone. I suppose solitude is meant to be good, but not to this extend now.

I think and think endlessly. I come to all those unhealthy thAlign Centeroughts. Argh. I once thought I’ve successfully let go everything I used to hold on to just few weeks ago. But just today, I realised I’ve not fully let go. Although I think I put pretty much effort in it already.

Going back to my title; I was just reluctant to eat the food on the table for dinner just now. I felt like I just didn’t want to eat those on the table. So, I decided to totally not to eat it. And now I secretly got my aunty to get me food. I was just not in the mood just now. Yes. I decided not to eat. I decided to throw my anger and frust out. I am freaking not in the mood. And now I am still waiting for my aunty and it’s 9pm.

I have been waiting endlessly almost every night. I am stubborn to have not changed. I am still wondering if I have lost someone. I wait (or maybe yearns) for the smses; which I doubt will even come. I am stucked in my emotions- thats what to describe my Monday today.

I just hate such feelings. Very honestly. My mind is now everywhere. My mind is scattered all over the place now. Thinking of this, that, him, or perhaps her and so on and so forth. How many more hours, days and weeks or years I have to endure. I’ve taken in so much. I’ve learnt much the past few months.

I need to get students in on Mondays and Fridays. I don’t want to keep thinking and thinking of things which aren’t beneficial at all. Argh.

Seeing things that is going so well with that person. I prolly wonder why am I so foolish to still even go view his profile and see what he does. Maybe when things are well, you aren’t needed. I don’t know and I have a very extremely bad day today after soo long… And I’ve never expected it to be this way since it was a day off for me.

Mondays and Fridays off till March may soon kill me if I don’t find something to do eh??

And coming to realise, I am shifting from Cheras Indah in less than a month’s time.

Semester 3

Date

Time

Location

Subject / Module

Lecturer

TUE,25-Nov-08 08:45 – 10:15 G-1:ROOM-4 ENT3 CT002-4-0-CIT-T-1 NITYA AHILANDAM A/P KAMALANATHAN
TUE,25-Nov-08 16:00 – 18:00 AUD-1 TPM BM008-4-0-RMDS-L-1 GOH BOON GEE
WED,26-Nov-08 08:45 – 10:15 G-1:ROOM-4 ENT3 BM008-4-0-RMDS-T-1 GOH BOON GEE
WED,26-Nov-08 10:35 – 12:35 L1 – 9 TPM CT002-4-0-CIT-L-1 INTAN CHEMPAKA BINTI ABU BAKAR
WED,26-Nov-08 15:30 – 17:00 G-3:ROOM-4 ENT3 CT003-4-0-PT-T-1 JUDYANNE SHARMINI FERNANDEZ
THU,27-Nov-08 08:45 – 10:15 G-1:ROOM-4 ENT3 CT003-4-0-PT-T-1 JUDYANNE SHARMINI FERNANDEZ
THU,27-Nov-08 10:35 – 12:05 G-1:ROOM-4 ENT3 CT002-4-0-CIT-T-1 NITYA AHILANDAM A/P KAMALANATHAN
THU,27-Nov-08 13:45 – 15:15 G-3:ROOM-4 ENT3 BM008-4-0-RMDS-T-1 GOH BOON GEE

Thats how much I am gonna be slacking the next semester. 3 days of class. Not that long classes. 6 hours break on Tuesday. This is gonna be fun but miserable a little. I see new lecturers name, old ones still stays like Ms Intan. I suppose the timetable looks really fun. I hope it stays till March next year, that’s be superb.. I am so sure you guys are gonna agree with me… Hahaha.

Tomorrow is Introduction To Business finals; I dont seem to care. Just want a pass out of it I guess. Lecturer suck big time for this.. =)

Oh yeah, and the subjects above?
RMDS- Research Development and Methodology Studies
PT- Perspectives in Technology
CIT- Computing IT.

I think a lot of playing computers and doing researches next semester. Might be fun or might not be fun.

Hmm..

As far as I can remember, the last time I blogged was at least a week ago. Not that I am gonna stop blogging but I’ve not much inspirations to write about lately. My dry-brains are killing me. Now when final exams is just next week on Mon, Tues, Thurs and Fri. I am gonna have a hard time doing it I reckon. I remembered during Semester 1, everything wrote was mere crap. Or perhaps somethings worst than crap. I opened book later than the eleventh hour for the last semester.

As for this Semester, i am trying to get myself up to study but instead I watched 6hours of TVB Drama in A DAY and I just did it again just now. And this is what they called Buffle Week or known as Study Week for us. Perhaps, just me. All I’ve been doing is to sleep, eat, online and watch dramas which I think is gonna ruin my semester 2 results tremendously. Well, not that bad lah. Since I might only screw QMS and my Introduction to Business Module. But well, I suppose I’d do okay but I am stopping these thoughts from even entering my brains as it will really torture me.

You also see me visiting less of blogs unless you are someone which is somehow related to me or somehow close to me; or perhaps if I have the obligations to do so. Then I will visit lah. Apart from that, who writes on my tagboard then maybe I’ll just pop over.

I’ve been ADORE-ing day in and day out; not myself of course but busy preparing for ADORE almost everyday. Which the excitement is so strong within me and the leaders now. We are all busy till we hardly have much other time just doing doing stuffs and preparing for it. It’s gonna be big. I’ll tell you guys more really really soon and you’ll know what I am up to.. =P

Yes. I am running away from emo posts and being ignorant about it for the mean time. =)

And not much things happened lah, basically. Life is quite the same recently. I am shifting house in about a months time. Should be December 11th. I am going to get so frustrated with packing my room and my stuffs. I am telling myself that I should not live in my confort zone but wells, me just an ordinary human and I am gonna hate packing! Trust me and Seriously, shifting house in December is no no joke!

Anything else you want me to blog about, write it on my tagboard. Or if you need any posts. Write it there. Till then, this is a post so tht this blog won’t die.. Just Yet!

Not the same

I realised I am no longer the same Alvin I used to be.
No longer the same person. I used to be more loving and understanding.
But now I think I am more mean and inpatient.
I will go on arguing when I think it’s right.
I no longer care about how others feel about me.
My priorities has also changed.
The people I used to care for I still care but I choose the keep that care within myself and not express it out even if it meant for me to take in everything.
I choose to succumb all the pain and anger within me till sometimes I feel that it is so hard to take it anymore.
I miss those people very much but yet I feel helpless at times.
All i know is that God is by my side carrying me through.
I know I am on a one-way relationship with these people.
They no longer give a big damn on what I do but yet I still do.
What can I do if my messages will be ignored?
What can I do if they choose to show no care and gratitude?
This one-way relationship has been the thing that has been messing with my life.
I know how I feel but yet I get so tired of how I feel.
I fail to express myself because I can’t find someone reliable that I can express it to unlike last time.
The people used to ask and care but now no one does.
I enjoy being a loner only to a certain extent.
It is not fun but I don’t see a choice in it.
God has been good and my faith has frown throughout these times although I pray that the past will still return.
I am filled with negative thoughts and am trying to do away with it.
Sick. Tired. Frust. Is what I feel.
I am sure Life has something more to offer than just all these pain.
Learning to endure.
Praying for the people I still love. Missing them.
I so want to meet them but obstacles lies right in front.
Do I have to go to the extent to peep on these people?
I am not gonna be a stalker, on the other hand.
Argh~ Life has something more to offer.
Am very very sure of it.